It’s the lack of pressure that makes it work.
“As soon as one promises not to do something, it becomes the one thing above all others that one most wishes to do.”― Georgette Heyer, Venetia
When I decided to stop drinking in November of 2018, I had no preconceived notions of where this would take me.
Before that time, I had been a lover of all things alcohol and really enjoyed my relationship with alcohol and pretty exciting life.
As shared, the one reason I decided to give up drinking was due to my focus on my personal business and a commitment to myself that I couldn’t give up on my entrepreneurial dream without first feeling I had absolutely given it everything I could.
Giving up drinking was the one thing that I knew was holding me back, and the decision to part with one of my “best friends” of so many years was not an easy one.
When I made this decision, there was one thing that I said to myself that has made all the difference as it relates to my alcohol-consciousness and could help you out in your endeavor as well.
My one commitment
This commitment is much different from where I am today, but when I first stopped drinking I was able to do so easily because I just made one simple promise to myself:
I’m not drinking right now because I just don’t think it serves me today, but I won’t say I won’t EVER drink again.
As counterintuitive as this sounds, this is the thought process that allowed me to get through every day of not drinking in the first six months.
It’s not that it was overly hard or that I wanted to drink all the time.
It’s just that I told myself I was going to drink for a short certain amount of time and then re-evaluate it at the end.
First, it was one week. One week then became one month.
One month then became three months to six months to so forth and so on.
I never said I was NEVER going to drink again, but that I was just going to see how I felt at that time and then assess if my life was better or worse without alcohol.
This relief of the pressure of NOT committing to not drinking actually was the thinking that didn’t overwhelm my brain and get me to thinking about all I could possibly miss out on because I wasn’t doing this anymore.
Instead, it allowed me to focus on the small chunks of time that I had committed to exploring what my life could be without alcohol and what I could accomplish in that time frame.
This framing then allowed me to stay focused on doing the things I need to protect my sobriety for that length of time and that length of time only.
As time progressed and I got past the six-month point, the thought of ever drinking again began to dissipate greatly to get me to the point that I am at today in which drinking alcohol is just not in my consideration set in any capacity.
I can say that with all confidence based on the three-plus years of growth and success I’ve been able to achieve since making that decision.
However, if you are newly sober, perhaps this simple technique to focus on the “for now” could be just what you need to take the pressure off and enjoy life and sobriety for today and let tomorrow take care of itself.