Life is to be lived…not to be watched or read about.
“If you have no regrets from the life you have lived, your biggest regret should be the life you haven’t lived.”
― Robert Sauber
Now hear me out.
I know this is probably surprising for some because of what I write about, but I have great reasoning to back this up.
I’m not saying that if you have a true problem with alcohol and are in a place where your drinking has resulted in endangering yourself or others, then you should continue.
Some people have developed an addiction and dependency on alcohol well before they are 30 and may need to go into rehab and get other treatment to live a life where this is not the case.
I’m NOT talking to these people.
Instead, I’m referring to people who enjoy drinking with their friends on the weekends and the occasional happy hour during the week.
I’m talking to those people who are more introverted than they want to be and could use alcohol to loosen them up in various situations.
I’m talking to those who want to have memories of “the nights they can’t remember with the people they won’t forget” (shoutout to Drake and his song “Show Me a Good Time”).
Even though I am a wellness advocate, I don’t consider myself a sobriety coach of any kind because it is not my belief that people should NEVER drink in life.
Instead, I believe there is a time in which drinking is 100% fine (in your twenties) and serves to help us have a more holistic life in the LONG-TERM for several distinct reasons.
It helps you realize what you’re capable of if you put yourself out there
We’ve all been there.
You’re at a party or at some social situation, and you want to go up and talk to someone that you’re attracted to, but you just can’t find the courage.
You’re trying everything in your mind to figure out what to say or what to do. You just need to move your legs and walk up and talk to that person, but you are stuck like a fly in a fly trap.
However, you’ve been sipping on your favorite cocktail for 30 minutes and now you feel a tinge of courage and confidence grow inside you.
Not only can you go over and talk to that person, but you also ask them to dance to get to know them better.
You even have a few witty one or two-liners ready to make them laugh upon arrival.
The truth of the situation is that you already had those one- or two-liners inside of you, ready to be used in the right situation.
Also, your dance moves have already been seared inside of you before that moment (even though alcohol does allow you to get a little “loser” with it);
However, it WAS alcohol that gave you that extra bit of courage to push past that initial fear and put yourself out there.
Alcohol often gives us the willingness to say or do things that we wouldn’t normally do but still have the ability to do.
If you’re drinking mindlessly and not being alcohol conscious of what has taken place, then this could be a problem, as this could become too much of a crutch for you.
However, by having these experiences in which alcohol “helps” you in some way do something that you didn’t think you could do, you should begin to realize that this is inside of you already all along.
You just have to be willing to push yourself to get out of your comfort zone and do it WITHOUT the alcohol to truly gain the skills without it and grow into the person you can be.
Alcohol helps you realize the possibility of who you can be if you push yourself, but you have to then put in the work to do it without alcohol for it to last forever and be a skill that you truly own.
Understanding what alcohol does for you versus what you can do for yourself brings us to the second reason.
You will be able to say you’ve done it and KNOW you can be better without it
Once you’ve experienced life while you’re drinking, you’ll have a lot of interesting experiences that will be seared into your brain.
Because you are alcohol-conscious when you drink (I talk about how you can do this in my book Bamboozled…How Alcohol Makes Fools of Us All), you know how it changes you mentally and physiologically.
You are aware of why you are feeling the way you are and how alcohol is giving you the courage to do some things but creating a need and dependence that will hinder you greatly later in life.
You can then begin to focus on doing the things that will allow you to continue to put yourself out there and embody the courage and confidence that alcohol gave you without worrying about experiencing the negative effects of hangovers, embarrassment, or potential legal/financial troubles it could cause.
Comparable to how I believe individuals should date a fair amount before getting married to KNOW their spouse is the perfect match for them, by drinking, you can compare your post-alcohol-conscious life to your pre-alcohol-conscious life and clearly see the benefits of living one over the other.
Otherwise, you may always wonder if life wouldn’t be better with drinking and start later in life when it can be more of a problem.
It’s f*cking fun!
The last reason may seem a bit trivial, but I assure you, it’s not.
We only get one life, and to say that you didn’t get a chance to see and do all the fun things it can yield can hardly be called living it.
I’m not saying that someone needs to drink so much that they could endanger themself or someone else.
I’m also not advocating drinking so much that it could possibly turn into a drinking problem at an early age.
However, there is some truth in the fact that alcohol can create situations of excitement and fun that may have never been created if alcohol were not in the equation.
While I would not want to go back to my drinking life in any capacity, there are numerous stories and memories that I have from that time that I will always look back on with fondness and joy.
For a two-year period of my life, from the age of 24–26, I was pretty much partying every single night of the week.
And while I can’t say that I accomplished a whole lot during that two-year period, the fun I had during that time was second to no other period in my life.
For that reason, I have no hint of desire or inkling of regret when I watch movies or see others on social media partying or doing outlandish things because I did that, made the memories, and have the T-shirt to prove it.
And even though that time was fun, and I am happy that it happened, I still feel amazing knowing that my life is much better now since that time is well behind me.